Thursday, December 09, 2004

Bullshit Offensive Fouls

I am so sick of all these bullshit offensive foul calls. I especially hate it when guys try to draw a charge MIDCOURT. Honestly. Get the hell out of the way and let the game go on at its normal pace. You ain't a defensive stopper just because you stand there holding your nuts and then flop around like Vlade having a seizure. Unless you clothesline line somebody, offensive fouls should only be called in the paint. And even then, unless you KG someone (ie, grab them in the nuts, haha Francisco Elson), only the person with the ball can be called for the charge. I feel like we're watching little girls on the playground with all these calls: "Ow! He touched me. FOUL!"

Another thing that pisses me off: I was watching the Twolves-Sixers game (by the way, the announcers for the game were so dull I actually wished for the hickory dickory Utah announcers)...What was I saying?...Just thinking of Hot Rod Huntsley/Hunter/whatever his name is gave me the chills and made me lose my train of thought...Oh yeah, Sixers-Twolves.

Anyway, I was watching the game and literally every single time Andre Iguodala did something, the announcer was like, "Wow! That's 6 points! He is having a career night. Wow! A three! This is a career night for the rookie!" Okay, first of all, he's a rookie. EVERYTHING he does his first year is a career something-or-another because - ya ready for this - it's the start of his career! It's like a baby. The first day he takes a step is a career day...that is, until the next day when he takes two steps. You don't hear parents screaming the day he takes 5 steps "Wow! 5 steps for little Johnny! This is a career night." Well, I could see Bill Walton saying something as stupid and asinine as that. Anyway, unless the baby runs a fucking marathon, it ain't a career anything. Similarly, unless Iguanadala or any other rookie scores 30+, don't be a jackass and herald it like it's the Second Coming. Give me a break! Oh and by the way, Iguana had 18 pts. WHAT A CAREER THIS YOUNG MAN IS HAVING!

PS. My friend's niece turned 3 months and rolled over by herself. WHAT A LIFE THAT BABY IS HAVING!

PPS. I'm an asshole, I know.

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