And On The 10th Day, They Rested

And probably partied a bit. It's Vegas, baby.

Photo Source: NBAE/Getty Images

Breaking News at Mexico vs Venezuela

The rim has fallen down! Nick Collison trying to take credit. Leo Rautins complaining about the extra warm up time for Mexico and Venezuela.

Update: The rim is back up. Horacio Llamas is testing its tensile strength as the crowd of tens looks on with bated breath. It has survived the Llamas test.

More bad news. The rim is not to regulation height. It's a half inch too short. Current time: 1:48pm. "Crowd" looks even more bored than usual. Team USA's 9pm start time may be further delayed.

1:55pm - Audience officially asleep. No, seriously. The one girl they keep showing in the stands is sleeping. Rick Kamla and partner trying to do their best to keep us entertained. FYI Kamla's wife does not like that he's not more of a handyman. Mercifully, NBA TV has decided to run the Amare Stoudemire halftime feature from last night's game.

1:59pm - Looks like the game may actually start. Another clip of the rim coming down. A portly hand with a white wristband is shown pulling at the net moments before the fall. Horacio may have been involved! Kamla just referred to this whole situation as "Rimgate." Hehe.

2pm - Tip off.

Team USA vs Argentina

MIDNIGHT EST!! Those of you on the East Coast who will be watching this, why? Just kidding. This is the last game of the second round. Tomorrow may be your last chance to see Horacio and co. Since the US and Argentina have the top two spots, the battle for 3, 4, and 5 and a spot in the Olympic qualifier next year is on between Canada, Brazil, Puerto Rico, and Uruguay. If both Puerto Rico and Uruguay win, it's going to be a 4-way tie.

Here's the schedule for tomorrow:

• 1:30pm - Mexico vs Venezuela on NBA TV
  
• 4pm - Brazil vs Uruguay on NBA TV and FSN
  
• 6:30pm - Puerto vs Canada on NBA TV
  
• 9pm - USA vs Argentina on ESPN2
  

Photo Source: NBAE/Getty Images

Why Lebron Played Extra Special Tonight

In tonight's game against Uruguay, Lebron scored 26 points, making all 11 of his shots in the process. While some may attribute this to his sterling work ethic - Lebron would never mail in a game - the more likely reason was the presence of two people in the crowd of thousands maybe 2,000. Okay 1,000.

Jay Z and Beyonce watched Team USA beat Uruguay 118-79. As a tribute, Lebron threw up the roc, something he hadn't been doing (thankfully) as much during the tournament.

I just don't get the point of the whole roc thing. First of all, it's a Pilates move. I can never remember the names of all the moves, so I just give them my own names, such as "Jesus H" and "no way in hell." Anyway, there's one exercise on the reformer - I think the original name is shaving or shave to the head or something - where you make a triangle with your hands on your forehead and then extend your arms at a 45 degree angle. When my Pilates instructor first showed me, I just called it the roc to make it easier. Finally, she was like, "Why do you keep calling it that?" So I explained to her that it's an asinine thing Jay Z does that he gets all his followers to do, too. She then asked me why, to which I responded I don't know. So I'll ask this time, why? What's the point of throwing up the roc? And what makes it any different from Doug Christie's hand signals to Jackie? They're both meaningless and insipid and worst of all, unoriginal. It makes the headbop look inspired.

Okay, back to the game. It was close there for a hot second. Carmelo sat out because of his heel. Amare continues to shoot 3's and discovers yet another way to piss Shaun Marion off. Tyson Chandler got some playing time. Despite being down 30, the entire Uruguayan bench stood up and cheered when one of their players pulled down a rebound over 3 USA players. Did I mention the guy was 5'9?

This was the closest game in that it was the longest Team USA had gone without the lead. Tomorrow's game vs Argentina should be even better.

Photo Source: NBAE/Getty Images

Who's the Fairest of Them All?

50-point victories aside, you think the boys are having fun in Vegas?

Photo Source: NBAE/Getty Images

Air Kendall

I couldn't find video of Levon Kendall in Air Bud, so this will have to do for now. I'm still looking for video of pre-Nolan Horacio.

Canada vs Mexico!

Watch Horacio NOW! If you wait, more than likely he'll have already been taken out of the game, so watch now!

Update:

• Llamas just scored. The announcer mentioned he did this despite his "gravity problem."
• Levon Kendall is looking good. And he's playing well too.
• Kendall was a child actor???
• Yup, he has an IMDB page. He was in Air Bud as "Additional Basketball Player."
• Leo Rautins looks like he has a black eye. Not surprising. He's like the Mark Cuban of FIBA Americas. The officials must love him.
  

What's Stronger Than Oak?

Not me, not you, and not Charles Barkley.

Charley Oakley was on PTI yesterday looking fit and scaring the crap out of everybody. I will never question his physical ability again. His mental health, maybe, but his physical ability never.

Here are some of the highlights from his interview:

• "If somebody call me, I'm ready to go at any time."
• When Mike Wilbon referred to Charles Barkley's quote about old guys thinking about coming back - People forget why these guys retired in the first place is because they weren't good anymore. - the Oak got a gleam in his eye and responded with, "He talk more now, he ain't said nothing when he played the game...He couldn't come back, right now. He's about 450. When he see me, we'll talk about that personally me and him. When he hears this interview, he'll know. When I see him, he gonna go the other way."
• About what he can bring to a team: "I can bring a lot to a team. Just my presence. I didn't win a championship but I've been to the Finals. I've been around great players who played the game. (Cue video of him with Michael Jordan.) Great coaches. I can bring a lot of influence. And that's what a lot of teams need - detail. You know, like a car wash. Manicure." Then he said something about a flower bed. I think he was still talking about a car wash.
• "I can at least make 28 of the 30 teams."
• Then, Tony got to the real possible reason of Oak's sudden desire to come back - he's writing a book. When Tony asked if Oak's return was because of his book, Oak responded, "Mmm, it's gonna be my whole career. I'm missing a couple chapters. I think Barkley just took one. If I don't come back, I'm gonna finish the book soon."
• Back to Barkley, Oak said he'd give him a car wash, but won't clean out his car because of all the donut boxes in the back.
• Of Reggie Miller: "He's a pioneer to the game. He's a class act, but he dress like Pee Wee Herman." (Cue photo of Reggie in a skinny gray suit.)
• Finally, Tony and Mike asked Oak to assess his chances of actually playing in the NBA next season. Oak gave it a "6 or 7. You never know."

If Oak comes back, who do you think he would slap first? More so than Orlando, I think Dallas needs him. Finally, Avery would have a player as tough as he is. And we might finally see Mark Cuban get slapped, especially if he wears his Dancing with the Stars costume to a game. Yeah, we need Oak back in the League.

Watch Horacio!

Also watch for Levon Kendall of Canada, who is the spitting image of Tiago Splitter. Levon's so pretty I keep waiting for Billy King to draft him on the spot. Otherwise, Levon better run if Horacio gets hungry.





Update: Oops! Mexico vs Canada is not til Wednesday. Today (Tuesday), Mexico plays Brazil at 5:30pm on NBA TV. Canada is playing Argentina at 3pm on NBA TV and FSN. My bad. Here's the new post-it.

Photo Source: FIBA Americas

Round Two: Team USA vs Puerto Rico

Close(r) Call for Team USA

Team USA beat Mexico 127-100. It's the closest margin of victory thus far for the Americans. An impressive victory nonetheless, that is, until you see who anchored, literally, Team Mexico. To your right is the starting center for Mexico, Horacio Llamas. According to Wikipedia, he's "the best center Mexico has ever produced." To me, he's more of a (Kings era) Vlade Divac / (any era) Eddy Curry hybrid. At least we can take comfort in knowing that Argentina, the only other undefeated team, only beat Mexico by 21 points.

You gotta give him style points though. Look at him rockin the two-toned sweatband, the black tights, and the white knee socks. Less (we see) is definitely more (to our benefit).

Update: Lang Whitaker describes Horacio as having " the body of John Goodman and the style sense of Turtle from 'Entourage.'" (I don't watch Entourage, but I can only assume a 'Turtle' isn't very attractive.) Also, those aren't Dwyane Wade-style tights, but rather kneepads. Oh Horacio.

I'm just going to copy and paste some of Lang's other observations about Horacio here because they're hilarious, but to read them in full, click HERE.

• On a lot plays, Llamas just ends up standing still as everyone runs past him in either direction.
• Lamas takes a dribble to his right, then tries to go behind the back with a dribble. This confuses his own body so much that he ends up falling over onto his butt and turning it over. Nolan Richardson takes him out.
• USA lobs it inside to Howard and Llamas just grabs him. If a chair had magically appeared on the court at that moment, Llamas would have immediately taken a seat. The man is completely exhausted.
• Llamas!! I think he just polished off a pizza and large order of nachos while on the bench.
• Kobe drives and Llamas swats the shot! That’s what a rested Llamas brings to the game.
• After 90 seconds, Llamas is removed from the game, totally gassed.

Photo Source: FIBA Americas

And I Thought I Had Bad Taste in Men

During the Bengals-Falcons game, Joey Harrington Heisman Harrington told Michelle Tafoya that Falcons owner Arthur Blank told him he believed in him. Oh Arthur. If he was a woman, he would have been taken to the cleaners by every Kevin Federline wannabe out there.

Speaking of the Falcons:

It's not forgive and forget, but forgive. And hope for the best.

Manolo Cintron Van Gundy

He's saying Pat Riley tried to push him out, too.

Leandro: Still Lookin' For His Balls

Halftime in the Brazil-Puerto Rico game and the Brazilians are down 28-39. The game's not being televised but you can watch a live feed through NBA.com. Right now, I think Leandro is 1 for 9. C'mon Leandro!!

In an earlier televised game, Canada eked out a win against Uruguay. For some reason, Canada kept prolonging the game by needlessly fouling when they were the team up by 6 with less than a minute remaining. Umm, good job, Canada?

Update:

• 4:37 left in the 3rd quarter, Brazil down 39-52.
  
• Leandro actually has 12 points.
  
• Puerto Rico's coach, Manolo Cintron, looks like the Puerto Rican Stan Van Gundy.
  

Round Two: Team USA vs Mexico

Nolan Richardson vs. Coach Krzyzewski

Coach K lost to Richardson in '94, but I have a feeling he's gonna win this time. Handily.

Team USA vs Mexico
Tonight at 8pm
ESPN2

Photo Source: FIBA Americas

Happy Belated Birthday, Michael Redd!

Team USA's premier 3-point shooter turned 28 yesterday. His knees turned 50. I always feel bad for NBA players when I see them swathed in ice after the game, or when I see the Chuckster hobble around TNT's studio, but then I remember they get a bajillion dollars to soften the blow. That plus the immense pleasure I get from watching them on the court makes it all worth it.

Photo Source: NBAE/Getty Images

Aww Leandro!

How can you not love Leandrinho?

Tayshaun's baby-faced Brazilian counterpart, Leandro Barbosa (left), who has been carrying the load for his team, was held to just 4 points tonight. Poor Leandro. Following the loss, he said,

"I knew that [Kobe] was going to come up and defense me and guard me like he did and all I was trying to do was get the ball, but I didn't have many balls in my hand. But that's OK. It's about tomorrow now, let's forget about this."

Hopefully, little Leandro is able to get more balls in his hand tomorrow against Puerto Rico.

Photo Source: NBAE/Getty Images

Tayshaun Noooooo!

Another reason for Pistons fans to hate Spurs fans: Tayshaun Prince sprained his ankle in the first quarter after landing on the foot of future Spur/current Brazilian Tiago Splitter. In the postgame press conference, Coach Krzyzewski (Damn! I almost did it without looking this time!) said he expected Tayshaun to be out at least 2 days. Hopefully, that's all the time it takes for Tayshaun's ankle to heal. The Brazilians, man, you gotta watch out for them. First Andy Rautins, now Tayshaun.

In honor of Tayshaun (and Andy - gotta love the Canadians), here's a song, courtesy of the J. Peterman crew: Get well, get well soon, we wish you to get well!

Photo Source: NBAE/Getty Images

Game 4: Team USA vs Brazil

Look who's waiting for you, Leandro!

Tonight at 6pm PST (early!):
Team USA vs Brazil
ESPN2

Update: Actually, it's NOT starting at 6pm because of a WNBA game. Sorry! Seriously, are you kidding me?

Update #2: Okay, the score is 8-0 so we haven't missed much, but just as I hate to miss the previews before movies, I don't like missing the beginnings of games!

Update #3: The crowd is chanting "Kobe." Is it too late to switch back to the WNBA game?

Update #4: :)

Photo Source: NBAE/Getty Images

Game 3: Team USA vs Canada

Photo Source: NBAE/Getty Images

Happy 29th Birthday, Kobe

Happy Birthday, Kobe!

I suppose for 2 minutes even I can wish Kobe a happy birthday. Plus Coach K, I mean Krzyzewski, said so.

Sidenote: It may be time for Mike Redd to consider going the Donovan McNabb route. Bald is sexy! Unless you're a Hasselbeck, in which case, it's just deserved.

Photo Source: NBAE/Getty Images

Team USA vs Virgin Islands

Okay, maybe this is what my post-it should have looked like:


Despite the score (123-59), I was impressed by the Virgin Islands squad. With 38 seconds left in the game and down 64 points, the ball went out underneath the US basket and it looked to be off Tyson Chandler but it was called USA's ball. Two Virgin Islands players went up to the ref to argue the call and then they continued to play for the remaining 38 seconds. I don't know what their mentality was, but it seemed to be don't lose by 64 when you can lose by 62. Basically, play til the very end. Is it any wonder Tim Duncan and Raja Bell are the way they are? Much respect to the Virgin Islands team. As long as they keep playing, I'll keep watching.

FIBA Americas: Day 2, Game 2

Photo Source: NBAE/Getty Images

American Gladiators is Back!

The show that inspired repressed athletes and repressed homosexuals everywhere is making a comeback! American Gladiators will make a return to NBC as a mid-season replacement this season. Woo hoo! Break out the red, white, and blue spandex! I'd rather take a Nitro-lookalike over My Name is Earl or backwards Prison Break everyday of the week.









Source: Variety via DListed

Thou Shalt Not Take Sheed's Name in Vain

USA vs Venezuela

Oh fuck. Bill Walton's the announcer?!?!?!

Wow, ESPN Classic, 11pm EST start time and Bill Walton. Team USA's really getting the royal treatment here.

FIBA Americas Update

5 minutes until USA vs. Venezuela!! Are people on the East Coast still awake for this??

Some notes from earlier today:

• There were more people at the sushi restaurant I went to for lunch than there were in the Thomas & Mack Center during the Uruguay-Panama game.
• The end of the Uruguay-Panama game would have been craaaaazy if that basket had gone in at the end of regulation after that ridiculous pass by the Panamanian team.
• The number of people at Thomas & Mack has been steadily increasing throughout the day. Maybe by the start of the USA-Venezuela game, there will be an actual crowd!
• I really hope Mike Krzyzewski doesn't get booed again. How embarrassing.
• I'm going to keep spelling Krzyzewski until I learn it. Not easy. And I just learned Szczerbiak.
  

GAME TIME WOOOOOO!!!! GO USA!!!

Congratulations Tom and Bridget! Hi Gisele.

THE baby, the Shiloh Jolie-Pitt of the NFL but not really, has come into the world! Bridget Moynahan delivered ex-boyfriend Tom Brady's baby son today in LA. Congratulations to the new mom and dad and girlfriend. I hope Bridget's doing well because it could not have been easy delivering that baby. Look at the size of her stomach! Congrats!










Photo Source: People

The Shaq and The Donald

Of these two, Shaq's the one wearing the hat??

Shaq and the Pink Panther were at Zo's Million Dollar Shootout at Trump National Golf Club. Also in attendance, Clyde the Glide.

Photo Source: NBAE/Getty Images

Summer Lovin'

We're about 10 hours away from the debut of Team Kobe USA. With the late start time and choice of channel, you'd think the NBA scheduled these games. I'm totally excited, but then again, I only saw like 7 basketball games all year so I'll take anything. I'm kind of worried though because I watched a lot of rugby and soccer while I was in France and there weren't a lot of commercial breaks in between. Actually, during the Super Bowl, France2 didn't know what to do with all the stoppages in play so while the American feed would go to commercial, the French feed would just stay on the empty field. Anyway, I watched the Bears-Colts game the other day and after the 20th commercial break (following Rex's umpteenth disaster) in the 1st quarter, I literally couldn't watch it anymore. It was too ADD. We'll see if I can sit through a game or if I'll have to start TiVo-ing everything.

Anyway, in honor of Team USA's inaugural game, here are some pictures from the summer. Go USA!

Andre Agassi with the Select Team. Sorry Kevin!

Kevin Durant with new coach, PJ Carlesimo.

Kobe, Amare, and Band Aid

Photo Source: NBAE/Getty Images

F@!*$% NBA TV

Hey guys. So NBA TV - and only NBA TV - stopped working yesterday, TWO days before FIBA Americas (Is anyone else having this problem??) and I've been on the phone with my cable company trying to get it fixed as they keep insisting that even though my 400+ other channels work, there must be something wrong with my receiver. And because the problem must lie with my receiver they have to send a technician out, but oh wait, there's a week long wait. Umm, homey don't play that. So yeah, the technician's here now and hopefully all this will be sorted out ASAP! You know, when I got my HDTV, I contemplated switching to DirecTV, but ultimately decided against it. If anyone's in a similar situation, go with the DirecTV!

Update: I hate incompetence. When I lost NBA TV, I asked my neighbors if their channel was working. Sadly, none of them had NBA TV. (And I also found out through FundRace that some of them gave money to Republicans! I should have known then.) So I called the thus far unnamed cable company and asked them to check their TVs to see if the feed was working. The idiot passing herself off as a customer service rep was like, "Yeah, everything's fine here." So the technician, after climbing through bushes and attics and whatnot, calls the cable company and asks them to check the feed. Nope, not working. Problem found and solved in 2 minutes. AGHHHH!!!!

What to Watch

Finally, a reason to watch Rome, or rather Guest Host. I actually watched it the other day when Jim Gray was the guest host and Amare Stoudemire came on with this massive band aid on his ear. I don't know whether Team USA trainers are just as bandage-inept as Suns trainers or Amare has the worst ear infection known to man, but that thing is huge! It almost distracted me from Jim Gray's obvious baiting of Amare, trying to get a good quote about the whole Donaghy affair. Impressively, Amare refused to bite. And Jim Gray tried everything, stopping just short of accusing Donaghy of insulting Amare's mama. Haha.

Score: Shaq and Amare 2, Jim Gray 0.

Rock the 'Hawk: Manchild vs. Child

Photo Source: Suns.com, Just Jared

It's Shaq's World. We're Just Living In It.

Photo Source: Reuters

Ode to Photoshop Eva

Oh Eva, Eva. Your beauty is as wondrous as the computer it was created on. As flawless as the graphic designer who toiled to make it just so. Some people look at you and see perfection, but Tony looks at you and sees dark circles and malnutrition.

I recently catalogued my magazine collection and I have over 200 back issues of Vogue, W, and Vanity Fair. (For those of you who don't know me, that's only the tip of the crazy meter. They are all in perfect or near-perfect condition.) I love the pictures, clothes, articles, everything. However, I am well aware of the power of those images to fuck a girl up, especially if she starts thinking those images are real. Well, they're not. Even with the best makeup artists, photographers, lighting, etc, Eva Longoria's never going to look like Eva Longoria without Photoshop. So, girls. Don't feel bad about yourselves when you can make those getting paid a shitload of money to feel bad about themselves. Hello! They can afford the therapy. And guys, always make sure you know what a girl looks like in the morning. And love her all the more.

Addendum: My friend's mom told me that guys also better look at a girl's childhood pictures because you never know who's had what done! LOL. Mama knows best!!

Photo Source: iWANEX Studio (there's more where that came from) via Dlisted

Dirk Down Under

Source

Sibling Revelry

I was thinking about doing an NBA Sibling rank, similar to the NBA Parent rank, but have you ever Googled "NBA player" and "brother"? Not quite the results I was looking for. Instead, I thought I'd do a post on Frank and Andre Iguodala, the preeminent brothers of the League (in my humble opinion) as it's constituted now. They just also happen to be gorgeous.

Quick aside: I think the ultimate example of the bond between brothers is Larry and the late Justin Hughes. However, I couldn't even begin to do justice to that story, but there's a good example here.

Also, I know some people consider the Waltons to be the Mannings of the NBA, but when I look at Luke Walton, I'm sometimes struck by the thought, "So that's what Satan's spawn looks like." It sounds harsh, but think of what we're taught about the Devil: white, red-haired, insufferable. Now think of Bill Walton: check, check, check. Anyway, back to Luke's more pleasing ex-teammate.

I sort of fell for the whole Iguodala family while watching NBA Rookies. His mother, Linda, was just so no-nonsense yet supportive - showing up to Andre's game against the Bulls in a Sixers jersey and responding to questions about possible heckling with "We're tough, too!" What really won me over about Andre was his genuine goodness. New Year's Eve in LA his rookie year, Andre still chose to come back to his hotel room early (11pm!) because it was the night before a game. Philly fans should be proud. Frank, aka FBI, participated in City Slam '06 where he apparently dunked over 3 girls. Cool family.

Honorable mention (including sisters): Dwyane and Tragil Wade, Joakim and Yelena Noah, Anthony and Candace Parker, Tony and Pierre Parker, Greg and Anthony Oden

Photo Source: Andre's official website

More Gatorade

While we're on the subject of Joakim Noah, I thought I'd finally do a profile on him. However, it's not often that an NBA parent outshines his son in fame or female fans. So rather, this is a post on NBA's Finest father-son tandem: Yannick and Joakim Noah.

Yannick Noah - the man pictured here in his underwear, as he is throughout billboards in France - is a living legend. After winning the French Open in front of a title-starved home crowd, he married (and divorced) Miss Sweden, and remade himself into a pop idol and cultural icon. At 47, he's filling up concert venues throughout Europe and campaigning with presidential hopefuls during his spare time.

Son, those are some mighty big shoes to fill. But Joakim's not doing too badly himself.

2006 Most Outstanding Player of the Final Four
2006 Most Outstanding Dancer of the Final Four*
2007 9th overall pick by the Chicago Bulls
2007 Most Distinguished Dancer of the Rookie Photo Shoot**

*By outstanding, I mean enthusiastic.
**By distinguished, I mean interesting.

Personally, much like Corey Brewer, I think Joakim's pretty fantastic with a capital F. He's just cool. So cool, that he could wear a bow tied seersucker suit and still look good. He reminds me of Terrence Howard (before he lost his mind) as Spaceman in Sunset Park. He also has that "man in a park without a care or worry" Andy Dufresne stroll - you know, before he was raped by the Sisters. Luckily, I don't think that's something Joakim has to worry about in Chicago, no matter how pretty he is. I find him to be immensely watchable and, after Kevin Durant, the rookie I'm most excited to see. Until then, this will have to tide me over:

Photo Source: Sloggi, NBAE/Getty Images

Joakim Noah: Officially French

Joakim became a citizen on Thursday, thus allowing him to join Tony, Boris, and Ronny on the French national team.

When I saw this video, my initial reaction was, "Oh my God, Joakim hurt his ankle!" But then I realized he was just dancing. Cool ou pas cool?

Photo Source: ESPN, German Ventriglia

Kobe Clarifies Questions About Wife

Yes, she can read. At a 5th grade level no less!

Further dispelling rumors that he and Vanessa are headed for divorce, Kobe told Jimmy Kimmel their fights are actually about rape Harry Potter. She reads the books, he watches the movies, she then tries to spoil the movie. Would that I could be a fly on the wall during those discussions.

While Kobe was busy showing that he's a big nerd who names his dog Dumbledore (Mamba my ass! More like Dumbledork), Kimmel showed his complete lack of soccer knowledge. When Kobe said his favorite athlete was Ronaldinho, Kimmel first responded "who?" before asking if he was retired. Seriously, even Posh knows who Ronaldinho is. Then again, it might just have been the way Kobe said it. He tried the whole I-can-speak-a-foreign-language accent. Whatever, Madonna. You can watch it here. Meanwhile, Kimmel-ites can watch the one and only Ronaldinho here.

Mom to Watch: Ann Iverson

An oldie, but a goodie. The clip, not his mom!! I love you, Mrs. Iverson!

Message to Reggie Miller and Charles Oakley

Photo Source: Wire Image

NBA's Finest Parent/Coach: Del Harris

I did a NBA Parent ranking of current players a few days ago, and a couple people mentioned that I omitted Mary Thomas, the gold standard of NBA parents and parents in general. I left her off the list because 1) I only included current players, and 2) I'm desperately trying to track down a copy of A Mother's Courage: The Mary Thomas Story before I write about her. I like visual aids.

Anyway, I recorded NBA First Person on NBA TV last week, and yesterday, I finally got around to watching it. (I'll pretty much watch/read anything NBA-related, although Paul Shirley's book is killing me. I'll explain more later.) The show, hosted by Ahmad Rashad (who else), featured Tim Duncan, Reggie Miller, and Del Harris. Judging by Ahmad's weight (about 20 pounds less) and the fact that it was Timmy's 1st year in the League, it was filmed 10 years ago.

Most of the stuff on Timmy and Reggie is pretty much already known to NBA fans. However, the pleasant surprise was Del Harris, coach of the Lakers during that time. He's crazy - not in a Ron Artest way, but more in a Gilbert Arenas way.

He reminds me of what George Bush would be like if he had a brain. Between him and Avery Johnson, the Mavericks now have my favorite coaching staff in the League. I think Jack McCallum should follow those two around next season.

By the way, I included Del as a NBA Parent because while not a player, his son is part of the League. This way, I can also include Don Nelson and Jerry Colangelo in my list of NBA Parent/Coach or Executive. That list is pretty short though. The only other people I can think of are George Karl and Bill Walton and who knows how long Coby will last and Bill isn't a coach or executive. So basically, I need to rethink this whole premise. Either way, Del Harris is pretty damn cool.

Somebody to Love: Chris Webber

How is C-Webb not married yet? He’s intelligent, good looking, and has about $100 million in the bank. Oh, AND he likes kids. At a recent NBA Cares event, Chris said, “I could spend the rest of my life with a room full of kids.” Seriously, how is he still single?? Look at that smile! C’mon, ladies. Mark Cuban wants him. You should, too.

Chris Webber. Tall, dark, handsome. SINGLE! Go for it!

PS. In my great search for my NBA Rookies tape, I came across an old episode of Real Time with Bill Maher which featured Chris. They discussed the dress code and the Viking boat sex scandal. Chris more than holds his own against the mighty Bill. Watch it. He comes on about 2 minutes in.

Lyrics: Queen, Somebody to Love

Photo Source: Deadspin

Basketball Without Borders: France

Ronny Turiaf (Lakers), Boris Diaw (Suns), Yakhouba Diawara (Denver Nuggets), and Mickael Pietrus (Warriors) show their true bleu colors in Paris, minus their compatriot Tony Parker, who bowed out due to injury. Also in attendance were Luol Deng (Bulls), Chris Duhon (Bulls), and Bo Outlaw (Magic).

Did you know Boris's middle name is Babacar? Mrs. Boris Babacar Diaw. Just kidding. I don't want to be had (p110). I'd rather be Mrs. Chukwuemeka Ndubuisi Okafor. Incidentally, Emeka will be at the next BWB camp in South Africa!! I'm so jealous. I've wanted to go to Johannesburg forever. If anyone wants to see a really good documentary about South Africa, watch Amandla. It traces the struggle against apartheid through song. The music is absolutely amazing.

Photo Source: NBAE/Getty Images

The T-Wolves: So Young And Yet Still So Unhip

The Timberwolves held a press conference yesterday to unveil their new young, sexy lineup. One of the attendees was Craig Smith, a 24-year-old out of Boston College who's entering his 2nd year in the NBA.


As if to show that Kevin McHale isn't the only out-of-touch member on the team, Smith wore a Vote for Pedro shirt. A must-have item...3 years ago. It'll look nice sitting next to one of Kevin's sweaters. Gotta love the new look T-wolves!

Photo Source: NBAE/Getty Images

The Allure of Steve Nash

Sam Dalembert became a Canadian citizen today, thus allowing him to join the Canadian national team. The coach of the Canadians, Leo Rautins, was once a Sixer himself. At Sam's introduction, he said,

"Sam is a humble but driven individual, that has stepped up to lead the charge of helping Canada assume its place among the best in the world."

Beware o' Canada. Tempting people away with their free health care and higher standard of living and superior point guard! (No offense, JKidd.) Who do they think they are!

Photo Source: Toro Magazine via Craig Silverman, AP Photo

NBA Parent Rank

While I look for my NBA Rookies tape, I thought I'd make a fun little NBA Parent ranking. These are just some people who've impressed, amused, or inspired me. I think they serve as a good counter-model to Hollywood/sports parents who, because of their child's earning potential, forget the role they're supposed to play. The parents listed here are also probably the closest to my Mom, who wasn't afraid to kick a little ass (both literally and figuratively) when need be.

I may revisit this list for future posts before the season starts. 84 days and counting...

Previous posts: Shirley Garnett, John Nash