Team USA beat Mexico 127-100. It's the closest margin of victory thus far for the Americans. An impressive victory nonetheless, that is, until you see who anchored, literally, Team Mexico. To your right is the starting center for Mexico, Horacio Llamas. According to Wikipedia, he's "the best center Mexico has ever produced." To me, he's more of a (Kings era) Vlade Divac / (any era) Eddy Curry hybrid. At least we can take comfort in knowing that Argentina, the only other undefeated team, only beat Mexico by 21 points.
You gotta give him style points though. Look at him rockin the two-toned sweatband, the black tights, and the white knee socks. Less (we see) is definitely more (to our benefit).
Update: Lang Whitaker describes Horacio as having " the body of John Goodman and the style sense of Turtle from 'Entourage.'" (I don't watch Entourage, but I can only assume a 'Turtle' isn't very attractive.) Also, those aren't Dwyane Wade-style tights, but rather kneepads. Oh Horacio.
I'm just going to copy and paste some of Lang's other observations about Horacio here because they're hilarious, but to read them in full, click HERE.
- On a lot plays, Llamas just ends up standing still as everyone runs past him in either direction.
- Lamas takes a dribble to his right, then tries to go behind the back with a dribble. This confuses his own body so much that he ends up falling over onto his butt and turning it over. Nolan Richardson takes him out.
- USA lobs it inside to Howard and Llamas just grabs him. If a chair had magically appeared on the court at that moment, Llamas would have immediately taken a seat. The man is completely exhausted.
- Llamas!! I think he just polished off a pizza and large order of nachos while on the bench.
- Kobe drives and Llamas swats the shot! That’s what a rested Llamas brings to the game.
- After 90 seconds, Llamas is removed from the game, totally gassed.