Kraft-y Russian

By far the funniest headline of the day was "Putin pockets Kraft's Superbowl ring!" Apparently, upon meeting the Patriots' owner, Vlad became so dazzled by his 2005 Superbowl ring that he decided to lighten Bob's finger by 124 carats.

Now you see it...

...Now you don't!

The best part - After he straight up jacked him, Vlad got Kraft to say he "gave" the ring to him. Talk about the ultimate politician. Mind you, though, Vlad's a man who's used to taking what he wants, whether it be diamond rings or people's freedom. Poor Bob didn't stand a chance.

On the bright side though, I now know how to get my hands on a PSP. I plan on puttin' a Putin on my friend Dave tomorrow. I've been eyeing his PSP for awhile. I'll let you know if I have what it takes to be a megalomaniacal Russian president.

More Popular than Tar Heels

What was more popular than Tar Heels at the draft?




The diagonal striped tie.
Everyone from Bogut on down was rocking it.
But the coolest person of the night?



Mickael Gelebale. From France. Of course.
Most likely to be dating Teri Hatcher when we see him next.

Shaq Daddy: NBA, MBA

Pretty impressive resumé.
Congratulations, Big Deez.

Draft Day

It's not about who goes where...
It's about what they wear!

Jackass of the Month: Freddie Ljungberg

In lieu of a Commissioner's Pet of the Week, I'm doing a special Jackass of the Month.

The NBA and its players are routinely castigated and villified for being too "hip hop." After the brawl, Rush Limbaugh took time out from insulting Donovan McNabb to declare the NBA was "hip-hop culture on parade...gang behavior on parade minus the guns." Not realizing the Palace of Auburn Hills isn't actually in Detroit, he also renamed Detroit "New Fallujah, Michigan." What a dumbass. Anyway, getting back to the point, one of the things critics point to when decrying the NBA's hip hop influence is the preponderance of tattoos. Too unprofessional, they sniff. Well, last time I checked, no player missed any games because of tattoos.

Now to Freddie Ljungberg, Swedish soccer player for Nick Hornby's beloved Arsenal, Calvin Klein model, wannabe fashion designer, and more impressively, not gay.

Freddie here missed four weeks of the season because of an allergic reaction to the ink in his panther tattoos. Yup, white boy was attacked by his black panther tattoos. If that doesn't qualify for jackass honors, I don't know what does.

Beyond that though, neither Arsenal nor the FA Premier League should really care that I think Freddie Ljungberg is a jackass. I've never attended a Premiership match nor have I ever bought any Premiership merchandise (except that David Beckham Man U poster in '99 ). At best, I've caught a few games on FSN, but it was purely coincidental. Likewise, why should the NBA care if Rush Limbaugh and his neo-Nazi followers think the league is too hip hop? Has Rush Limbaugh ever attended an NBA game in his life? Has he ever bought a jersey, a poster, anything? Why is the league so concerned about losing his support, his money when it never had either in the first place? Who cares if people in Kansas and Oklahoma are offended by tattoos and cornrows! There's a reason why teams aren't there in the first place or why they packed up and said "peace out!" Besides, people in Middle America should be more concerned that their daughters are turning tricks for shopping money, or as Bill Maher would say, "They're selling coochie for Gucci." Leave the NBA to the people who actually care about it, all 9 of us.

And I Thought I Liked Avery

Angie Harmon gave birth to her second daughter with husband, NFL "star" Jason Sehorn, in Dallas last Wednesday naming her Avery. Their first daughter is named Finley. Apparently Nowitzki Sehorn was already taken. Either they're the biggest Mavs fans in existence or they're on Mark Cuban's payroll.

Cloning

I think the Aussies have been hiding something from us.

Now Let's Listen In On the French Broadcast!

(In honor of ABC's fine job with the Finals.)

En fait, C'EST la vraie raison

Qui obtient plus de femmes que des rappers ou athlètes? Que diriez-vous d'un Français rapper/athlete. Déplacez-vous par-dessus, T.I. TP9 montré outre de ses qualifications la nuit des dents du championnat de rassemblement samedi, un de ces choses que vous devez voir pour croire. Je ne sais pas ce qui était plus drôle - RAP de Tony ou la danse de Brent Barry. Brent n'était pas tout à fait le fantôme de Marquez Madsen , mais vous avez l'idée. Si vous la manquiez, ou comme moi vous attrapiez seulement les points culminants parce que NBA TV a décidé de montrer un jeu de WNBA au lieu d'aérer le rassemblement de phase, vous pouvez vérifier la vidéo ici .

Actually, THIS is the Real Reason

Who gets more women than rappers or athletes? How about a French rapper/athlete. Move over, TI. TP9 showed off his skills at the Spurs' Championship Rally Saturday night, one of those things you have to see to believe. I don't know what was funnier - Tony rapping or Brent Barry dancing. Brent wasn't quite the ghost of Mark Madsen, but you get the idea. If you missed it, or like me you only caught the highlights because NBA TV decided to show a WNBA game instead of airing the rally live, you can check out the video here.

Seriously, how are they not going to show the Champion NBA rally live?? I'm mad, mad as hell because I set my VCR to tape it at its designated time, but they didn't show it until 3 hours later so I missed the whole thing. For real, how can they honestly expect people to be home on Saturday night AND wait through a WNBA game?? Bloody bastards. Anyway, back to the rap superstar.

He even had Beno dancing! If Rasho and Sean Marks got up, this video needs to be immediately immortalized in the White Boy Hall of Fame.

The REAL Reason Eva's with Tony

"Ball don't lie."