Cojones*

Slam has a fantastic article by John Krolik on the rightful heir to Sam Cassell's testicle dance. (The only adjective I can think of to properly describe the dance is 'singular,' but somehow 'singular testicle dance' just sounds wrong...and misleading.) Thus far, only Kobe and Andre Iguodala have been brazen enough to show off their cojones (Andre in front of the one and only Sam I Am). Kobe broke out the dance again tonight after a late basket against the Jazz, but like the last time against the Spurs, Lakers lost. Last time, Roger Mason, Jr. answered back with a testicle dance of his own. This time, Mehmet Okur answered back with what can only be characterized as the Jonas version of Sam's dance. I'm trying to find a clip of it, but the only video of the game on YouTube cuts off before the end.

My vote is for Roger Mason, Jr. Sam had a swagger disproportionate to his position on the NBA totem pole. Roger Mason - 2nd rounder, journeyman - has the same outsized bravado.

Krolik dismisses Manu as a possible heir, saying:

I’m pretty sure Manu thinks the dance means “I have accumulated a lot of change and am unsure what to do with it, so for the moment there is much change in my pockets, which I find unwieldy.”

This can also describe Mehmet's dance. Check out the other potential heirs apparent here.

*Quick note to my very white friend, Jay. Cojones is not pronounced 'co-jones,' which is what I know you were saying in your head. It's Spanish and therefore pronounced 'co-ho-nez.'

Tonight's Lineup

I purposely delayed my flight another day so I could watch tonight's match ups. (Well, that and the fact that I'm not emotionally prepared to leave my dog. My cousin's like, "I don't even know who you are anymore.") Boston has the chance to sweep the 3 Texas teams for the first time since '01 and I fully expect them to do so because KG is going to be a beast tonight after being called out for tanking. Tanking...for missing the last 5 games of the season after toiling essentially alone for the last 12 years for Minny. I have the same thing to say to Glen Taylor as Faith Hill said to the ho bag who grabbed her husband's balls: "You gotta learn some class, my friend." He could take some lessons from Micky Arison. I don't know much about Micky Arison personally, but the way he handled the Shaq trade spoke volumes about his character. If Boston goes up by 25 early on, we may even see a smackdown between Mark Cuban and Avery Johnson. My money's on Avery. You know he's still scrappy as ever.

Update: Mark Cuban is MIA. Official excuse - "family commitment." What it really means - he has a responsibility to his family not to get beat down on national TV by an employee.

Jerry Sloan Mad at Gordan Giricek; Kyle Korver Punished

In the buildup to Pats-Giants, I completely missed the news that Kyle Korver was traded to the Utah Jazz for Gordan Giricek, Jerry Sloan's latest whipping boy. Giricek was the one that acted up yet Kyle is the one being banished to Utah. I guess the strategy of trading away the team's most popular players didn't end with Billy King. Poor Philly. Poor Kyle.